Women’s Day Magazine and AOL surveyed over 3,000 married women. On married life. Flirting. Infidelity. And the results are very promising. If you’re a divorce attorney.

When asked if they could go back to their wedding day and do it all over again, would they still marry their husband, a whopping 36%, said: “Nope. Not so much.” Wow. Over a third of married guys are sleeping with a woman - every single night - who wishes she’d have said “I don’t”. One out of every three.

And another 20% weren’t sure either way. Not sure? To me this is one of those crystal-clear, black or white, yes or no, type questions. I have to think “not sure” is a nice way of saying “he’s a loser, but at least it’s better than trolling 80’s retro dance clubs in a leopard spandex top, looking for the one guy without a toupee.” So, being completely unscientific and self serving, I am going to add most of those 20% “Undecided”s over to the “No Way” group. Meaning that about half of all married women in the US are sorry they married the poor bastard.

So the next time you drive by a kids’ soccer game, figure every other mom cheering from the sidelines is miserable. (I just realized that came off like a dating tip. Before my female readers storm The Pad, let me state that I absolutely do not encourage adultery. Unless you have a realistic shot at Jennifer Garner. Then it’s completely understandable. Sorry, Ben.)

If that’s not depressing enough for all you married guys (or soon-to-be-married guys) out there, here’s some of the other gems this survey uncovered: 76% of married women regularly keep secrets from their husbands. Another 76% admit to fantasizing about a man other than their husband. (I see a pattern there.) And 39% admit to flirting with other men “constantly”. Makes you want to change professions to Youth Soccer Coach.

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